Fulfilling relationships are a cornerstone of a life well lived.  And yet they are not that simple.  Whether it’s the challenging work colleague, the annoying sister, the “take me for granted” children, the absent partner, the interfering parent or anyone else, or ALL of them(!) relationships can make for hurt, misunderstanding, conflict and many other messes!  OR joy, companionship, love, freedom, respect and trust.

Of course relationships take two to tango!  One simple, but not necessarily easy, thing you can do to improve your relationships is to become more aware of your relationship with yourself.  When we feel good about ourselves it is easier to feel good about others.

If we put a lot of expectations on ourselves we are likely to put them on others.  If we are continually finding fault with ourselves we will find fault with others.  After all, why let them off the hook?  When we “put ourselves down” we are inclined to subconsciously find reasons to have others meet us where we have put ourselves!

Being loving, gentle, kind and forgiving with ourselves may initially feel awkward.  Yet it is not being selfish, or being “too easy” on ourselves.  It is appreciating ourselves for who we are.  When we love what we value in ourselves, accept that we are unique and appreciate our idiosyncrasies how much gentler and easier we can be with ourselves.

Self love and appreciation open the door to love and appreciation of others, their individuality and identity. It allows that underneath the dramas so often there is love.  This pathway of connection, understanding, acceptance and harmony can arise from self love.

We are all a work in progress!  That is part of the deliciousness of being human.  Enjoying and celebrating that diversity is liberating for everyone.  When we are loving and gentle with ourselves we can more easily extend that to others, creating relaxing, respectful and joyful relationships.